


damned if I'll be found there

by lesbianjackrackham



Series: Many trains and many miles [3]
Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: Emotional Constipation, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 09:51:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14850518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianjackrackham/pseuds/lesbianjackrackham
Summary: They’d spent about five minutes sweeping before realizing the low likelihood of someone walking in on them, and another five or so kissing before Doug broke the sound barrier and committed insecticide.





	damned if I'll be found there

“Oh my god, stop. Stop... please? Uh. It’s okay. Right? All gone. All better.”

Doug won’t stop crying. And to be fair, he seems kind of mad about it, except, wait, no, he’s mad at Jacobi. That puckered up frown is for him.

“—The fuck?” Doug says between gasps of air. He’s still clutching the mop, fingers tight around the top of the handle, holding the sponge as far away from himself as possible. “What are— what are you—”

“I don’t know?” Daniel gestures up at the ceiling like maybe the answer is somewhere up there. Except there’s nothing up there except for the remains of something that used to be an insect. He thinks. There’s the slim possibility it could have been a lizard, but no, lizards don’t have that many limbs. “You’re crying!”

“Yes! Yes I am! But you’re— What’s wrong with you?”

“Me? You’re crying over a bug!”

“I’m not crying over a bug, and you’re telling me to shut up over crying over a bug that I’m not crying over!”

“Hey, I pivoted! I said it was alright and then made the shushing noises.” They’re both yelling now, and he’d be worried that the others would come check on this clusterfuck of a conversation, but no one came running after Doug’s incredibly high-pitched scream before he stabbed the ceiling, so they’re probably safe. “But I just don’t— Why are you crying?”

“Fuck if I know,” says Doug, and he’s not crying anymore, just sniffling and frowning, and if Daniel was a better person he’d find the man a tissue or something, but they’re in the damp box called ‘the basement’ and there’s nothing down here but dust and cobwebs and bugs from Hell.

The original plan was “guys can you please pitch in and clean the fucking basement, we all have to live here and since Isabel and I are fucking I can’t make her clean a gross basement even though she does way fewer dishes than anyone else.” Again, he might be paraphrasing, and he owes Minkowski his life or whatever, but no one is willing to tell her that technically she isn’t their commanding officer anymore. (Probably because none of them would be able to cope as semi-functional human and non-human beings without her bossing them around, but that’s besides the point.)

They’d spent about five minutes sweeping and mopping before realizing the low likelihood of someone walking in on them, and another five or so kissing before Doug broke the sound barrier and committed insecticide.

Doug says, “I just freaked at the—“ He shudders. “And it was intense, you know?”

“No? Wait, what was? Killing the bug?”

“Yeah.”

“Ah,” says Jacobi, a guy who has killed lots of human people on purpose.

“What?”

“That’s kinda... It’s cute, actually.” And it is. Doug Eiffel 2.0 hasn’t killed anyone. He’s not 100% sure about 1.0 (Eiffel was in the military, after all,) but this version, at least, cries when he kills bugs. It’s sweet.

“Uh huh,” says Doug, not sweetly at all. “Can we go back to the part where you yelled at me to stop crying? Because I’m still working on social skills and shit, but I think that was a bad one.”

“No, yeah,” says Daniel. “Um. Will you settle for an ‘I’m fucked up?’” Doug just looks at him. “No, then?”

“Dude.” Daniel clicks his tongue and tries to ignore Doug’s ‘concerned judgmental face,’ which he’s pretty sure has some kind of magic guilt powers.

“I don’t know, man. Crying freaks me out. I don’t— You don’t cry in SI-5. You don’t cry when you’re a military contractor. You don’t cry— where I grew up. I don’t cry unless I’m drunk enough not to remember it. So you... I just freaked. I’m sorry it was. That I’m. That.”

“Huh,” says Doug, and Daniel shrugs. Doug puts the mop down, and Daniel opens his mouth to say something because come on, now there’s bug guts on the part of the floor they actually cleaned, but Doug just walks forward and pulls him into a tight hug.

They just stand like that for a minute or so, Daniel’s face pressed into Doug’s shoulder, and Doug smells like sweat but it’s kind of in a nice way. He doesn’t have a lot to compare it to, but he’s pretty sure it’s a great hug.

“Apology accepted,” Doug says into the top of his head.

“I didn’t apologize.”

“Yeah you did.”

“Ugh,” says Daniel, and kisses Doug so he stops looking so smug and kind about all of it.

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by true events, unfortunately. @lesbianjackrackham on tumblr


End file.
